Monday, November 17, 2008

my side of the bed

He fell asleep. Comfy and quiet inside my arms. I can hear his steady breath in my right ear. I open my eyes and slowly rearrange his position, sliding him slowly out of my arms - into his side of the bed. I have to continue my assignments. Tomorrow is the deadline. My dead line, if I don't submit it on time. I open the first page on my documents. The white bed sheet wrinkles under his weight. And so does the white pillow sheet. The dim afternoon sunlight goes through my purple curtain and paints his face with an amazing light and shade. The reflection of colours from the paintings of buildings on our wall saturates the room into red, yellow, and blue. And I am still staring at a blank page in my laptop screen. Focus, focus.

I start to type: Module, Name, Class, Student ID, Lecturer, Due Date.

Due Date. Deadline. When is my deadline for this? This very moment that I've been having since he asked me to take his reaching hands. When will be the last time I am able to hear him say, "Send me to sleep, Dear" ? I stare at the empty space beside his untroubled slumber - my side of the bed. I saw him hurt before, I made him hurt before. Will I be hurting him again when the time comes where I will not be able to hush him to sleep? How much will it ache for me when it happens?

I lean close to him and kiss him softly, slowly. Sending him my silent lullaby. I don't think I can do my assignment.


Davin said...

eh ditcil, baru liat blog elo tadi dari blognya myla. gw link ya, link balik dong ke gw. hehe


Anonymous said...

hey dit, i like your writing!